September 27, 2022


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Expensive Abby: Mother’s lack of inhibition hassle son’s girlfriend


DEAR ABBY: I’ve been with my 45-year-old boyfriend, “Doug,” for six years. His mom, who was widowed 5 years in the past, has moved right here to Florida from New Jersey. Doug may be very protecting of her, which I form of perceive as a result of she’s 63. The kicker is, she has began flashing her breasts at us. I’m fairly certain she does it to Doug after I’m not round as properly. I’ve talked about to him a number of occasions about how disturbing it’s, however he brushes it off and refuses to confront her. We’ve grownup kids, and she or he not too long ago went into the pool with all of them with nothing on. It’s beginning to fear me. I don’t wish to be the one to confront her as a result of it’ll get ugly. — FLASHED IN FLORIDA

DEAR FLASHED: Has Doug’s mom all the time been a “free spirit” who thinks flashing and skinny-dipping are amusing, or is her exhibitionistic conduct one thing new? If she has all the time been this manner, somebody ought to level out that what she’s doing is inappropriate except it’s clear that no person minds. On this case, YOU thoughts, and I wouldn’t be stunned in case your grownup kids had been additionally lower than enthusiastic in regards to the lady’s efficiency. If her exhibitionism is one thing new, then she needs to be evaluated, first by a physician who focuses on geriatric sufferers and, if essential, referred to at least one who focuses on geriatric psychiatry.

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DEAR ABBY: My spouse and I’ve been married 36 years. Ask anybody who is aware of us, they usually’ll say we’re the proper couple — no main points, loving, trusting, and so on. I used to be recognized with Lewy Physique Dementia three years in the past, and my spouse has been a godsend. I couldn’t ask for a greater accomplice.
The opposite day I overheard her on the cellphone, and one thing she stated caught my consideration. After I requested her about it, she confessed that she had cheated. She stated it had occurred two or 3 times, two or three years in the past along with her first boyfriend from faculty. He had contacted her to get collectively for espresso, and he kissed her. The following time he got here to our city, they met at his lodge room and had intercourse. Abby, I’m devastated, however there’s nothing I can do. I’m 50% depending on her, and it’ll solely improve. She stated I can ask her something in any respect, and she’s going to reply me truthfully. I haven’t but, as a result of I’m nonetheless in shock. Please assist me determine what to do. — FEW OPTIONS IN NEVADA

DEAR FEW OPTIONS: I can solely think about how harm you should be, and for that you’ve my sympathy. Since you want your spouse to take care of you through the course of your sickness, the obvious factor I can counsel is that you just not ask her these sorts of questions. Her infidelity might have occurred as a result of she was devastated by the medical prognosis you had simply acquired. The healthiest factor for each of you’d be to respect her for her honesty and forgive her for her moments of weak spot.

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Expensive Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also referred to as Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Expensive Abby at or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.